“It’s a good thing you’re so cute.”

Every (normalish) parent has said/thought/passively aggressively muttered this at their child.  People are crazy.  Toddlers are just slightly crazier versions of the people they will become.

I know adults that do things that are absolutely bonkers and counterintuitive on a regular basis.  To expect more of a toddler is delusional.

Seriously, if I throw a socially-acceptable fit when my iPhone breaks, why would I expect my 2 year old to behave well when he is denied the pleasure of a gummy bear or a splashpad? Those are unrealistic expectations, people.

Nonetheless, toddler logic is about as complicated as quantum physics.  I have a feeling that Stephen Hawking struggled more with parenting than studying black holes.  Black holes may make more sense than toddlers.

Therefore, evolution has ensured that sleep-deprived parents do not chuck their toddlers off a bridge.  Toddlers are cute.

Bambino has done the following  in the last few weeks:

• Refused to adhere to any type of sleep schedule;
• Painted a wall with milk (could have been worse…);
• Poured a full drink onto his father’s pants in public;
• Punted a bag of chips at his best friend’s mother (It rained Doritos!); and
• Took an obvious poo while squatting in an aisle at Target.

This is not a comprehensive list.  If I did any one of these things, the cops would be called.  When Bambino does these things, people chuckle. “How old is he?  He’s precious!”

Like I said, thank heavens he’s cute.  (More cuteness tomorrow.  Promise.).